Really Thucks Noah Has A Thor Arm
As the old expression goes, you can count on three things in life, death, taxes, and Mets pitchers ruining your week/month/season with an injury of some sort. This is a slight update on the late 80's...
View ArticleFeliz Upheaval Grants Reprieval For Knebel
Brewers manager Craig Counsell announced Friday that after Thursday's blown save, Neftali Feliz would be given a break from closer duties. Why are you like this, Craig? Do you not care about my fantasy...
View ArticleAroldis 30-Day In-Season Vacations Always Involve Cuffs
Yesterday, on the holiest of Hallmark-created holidays and celebrated most of all by Bill Hall, mothers from all different backgrounds came together to put up their feet, sip mimosas and talk about how...
View ArticleAmbulance Chasers, Week 7: UnGodley Numbers
The fantasy baseball roster you could make out of the current disabled list would easily be in first place in many rotisserie leagues. If you left your draft with all of these players healthy you would...
View ArticleBuy Into The Smoak Monster Before You’ve Lost Your Opportunity
Justin Smoak isn't simply the hottest hitter in all of baseball. No! There's more! He's hitting near-.400 in the last week with four homers. But wait, there's more! Justin Smoak is the world's...
View ArticleFanDuel: Severino on a Mission
Are you also old enough and/or vaguely goth enough to know “Severina” by The Mission (if you do, hit me up in the comments! 1986 represent!)? And perchance does that song also pop into your head every...
View ArticleKenya Believe How Much Ryan Zimm Bombs Away
When Ryan Zimmerman hits a homer, they should play the Coming to America clip where Murphy says, "In dee face," at the basketball game. Speaking of Africa (sentence intro commonly found on fantasy...
View ArticleAstros Find The True Successor To Kevin Bass
Derek Fisher was called up by the Astros to replace the concussed Reddick. First off, Derek needs to stop singing that jingle, "Trust the Astros Fisher, man." Tres annoying. Saying tres instead of...
View ArticleMatt Davidson Hosts “Homerwood Squares”
After homering in his fourth straight game, Matt Davidson (2-for-4, 2 runs) is halfway to Dale Long's record of home runs in eight straight games. A record I didn't think would ever be matched, aside...
View ArticleAmbulance Chasers, Week 12: Razzball + RuPaul = A Match Made In Heaven
This might be the only Razzball article where you will find a RuPaul’s Drag Race quote, some lyrics from the Broadway musical Wicked, a reference to Matt Harvey’s sex appeal AND a Tyra banks gif. It’s...
View Article“To Kill A Fantasy Team” By Harper Knee
On Saturday night, Bryce Harper lunged for first base, slipped and his leg went the wrong direction. Like two white guys meeting, one goes for the handshake and one goes for the hug and it just goes...
View ArticleGray Pilots The Plane While Rockies Take Braves Pitchers To Bathroom
On the ones and twos, it's not DJ Khaled, with a cigar in his baby's mouth, dropping another one in a major key. It's yo' boy, DJ LeMahieu (4-for-5, 4 runs, 1 RBI), the French-sounding EDM mixmaster,...
View ArticleFanDuel: Big Maple
"Big Maple" James Paxton takes the mound on Thursday in his second start off the disabled list, facing the Rangers at home. Paxton's first start off of the DL was a disaster, but that's often the case...
View ArticleFanDuel: Play Stressbird!
It’s actually really unfair that poor Stephen Strasburg still has the “Stressbird” moniker in these here Razzball parts, but old habits and nicknames die hard. [Sidebar: Plus I went to a music festival...
View ArticleTop 20 1st Basemen for 2018 Fantasy Baseball
? I have to keep this short, because after the jump is going to be the longest post you've ever seen in your life. How do I know all the posts you've seen to compare this one to? Because I'm sitting...
View ArticleTop 20 2nd Basemen for 2018 Fantasy Baseball
Before we get into the top 20 2nd basemen for 2018 fantasy baseball, let's go bobbing for clickbait. Here's my top 10 for 2018 fantasy baseball, top 20 for 2018 fantasy baseball, top 20 catchers for...
View ArticleRangers Put Away Willie Out Of Fear There Are Holes In His Glove
And we have have our first stupid team decision! Don't worry, there will be more. Or maybe I should say Willie be more. Or maybe should say Willie be less now. The Rangers decided to send down...
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2018 Spring Training Positional Battles: AL East
The AL East is "big boy" baseball. Four teams from the division ended 2017 in the top 10 for home runs in all of baseball. The Yankees were first with 241, the Orioles were fifth with 232, the Rays...
View ArticleFanDuel: Cash(ner) for Yankees
Today we have a situation that will present itself from time to time on Mondays and Thursdays (the standard travel days, in case one was wondering) - a slate with only a few games to pick players from....
View ArticleFanDuel: Picks For May 11, 2018
This is an interesting slate, which I hope you’ll all enjoy. There’s a lot of ins, a lot of outs, a lot of what-have-yous. There are three aces and I recommend paying up for one. There’s Mike Trout...
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